Fragment from The Chaos
by G. Nolst Trenite' a.k.a. "Charivarius" 1870 - 1946

Dearest creature in creation ˈdɪəɾəst kɾi:tʃə in kɾieiˈʃən

Studying English pronunciation, ˈstʌdi:iŋ ɪŋlɪʃ prənʊnsieiˈʃən

I will teach you in my verse ai wil ˈti:tʃ ju: in mai ˈvɜ:s

Sounds like corpse, corps, horse and worse ˈsaʊnz laik ˈkɔ:ps kɔ: hɔ:s ənd ˈwɜ:s

I will keep you, Susy, busy, ai wil ˈki:p ju: ˈsuzi bizi

Make your head with heat grow dizzy. ˈmeik jɔ: ˈhed wið hi:t ˈɡɾəʊ dizi:

Tear in eye your dress you'll tear, ˈtiə in ai jɔ: ˈdres jəl ˈteə

So shall I! Oh, hear my prayer, sɔ: ʃa:l ai ɔu ˈhiə mai ˈpreə

Pray, console your loving poet, ˈprei ˈkənsəʊl jɔ: lʌviŋ ˈpəʊət

Make my coat look new, dear, sew it! ˈmeik mai ˈkəʊt lʊk ˈnju:w diə səw it

Just compare heart, beard and heard, ʤʌst ˈkəmpeə ˈha:t ˌbiəd ənd ˈhɜ:d

Dies and diet, lord and word, ˈdaiz ənd ˈdaiət ˈlɔ:d and ˈwɜ:d

Sword and sward, retain and Britain. ˈsɔ:d ənd ˈswɔ:d ˈritein ənd ˈbritən

(Mind the latter, how it's written). ˈmaind ðə lætə haʊ it iz ˈritən

Made has not the sound of bade, ˈmeid həz nɒt ðə ˈsaʊnd əv ˈbæd

Say said, pay-paid, laid, but plaid. ˈsei sed ˈpei peid leid bʌt ˈplæd

Now I surely will not plague you ˈnaʊ ai ʃɔ:li wil nɒt ˈpleig ju

With such words as vague and ague, wið sʌtʃ ˈwɜ:dz əz ˈveig ənd ˈeigju

But be careful how you speak, bʌt bi: ˈkeəfʊl haʊ ju ˈspi:k

Say break, steak, but bleak and streak. sei ˈbreik ˈsteik bʌt ˈbli:k and ˈstri:k

Previous, precious, fuchsia, via, ˈpri:viəs ˈpreʃəs ˈfʊkʃiə ˈvaiə

Pipe, snipe, recipe and choir, ˈpaip ˈsnaip ˈresipi: ənd ˈkwaiə

Cloven, oven, how and low, ˈkləʊvən ˈʌvən ˈhaʊ ənd ˈləʊ

Script, receipt, shoe, poem, toe. ˈskript ˈrisi:t ˈʃu: ˈpɔəm ˈtəʊ

Hear me say, devoid of trickery: ˈhiə mi: sei divɔid əv ˈtrikəri

Daughter, laughter and Terpsichore, ˈdɔ:tə ˈla:ftə· nd ˈtepsikari

Typhoid, measles, topsails, aisles. ˈtaifɔid ˈmi:zəlz ˈtɒpsəlz ˈailz

Exiles, similes, reviles. ˈeksailz ˈsimili:z ˈrivailz

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